I’m Over It
I had a tapping session with a client yesterday I’ll call “Connie.” We used an EFT tapping technique that worked especially well. We were working to clear anything she had remaining over the sudden death of her adult son, four years ago.
At first she told me she had already cleared everything from that tragedy and released the whole event. But I suspected there were still things there, as she also said that it was the most difficult, most traumatic event she had endured in her life.
Tell the Story
We were using the Tell the Story EFT tapping technique. And, as I’ve been doing lately with clients, we tapped continually from the moment she sat down.
As she was telling me the story, she got to the moment that she got the phone call from the coroner’s office. She was about to breeze right through that part, but I had her slow way down and break that part of the event down into slow motion. When she slowed it down, she went from feeling neutral and no emotion to being flooded with pain.
Even when releasing serious trauma, it’s not necessary to feel all those painful emotions. So I stopped her, to prevent her from re-experiencing that trauma.
Instead I distanced her from the pain by telling her to see herself in a movie screen, answering the phone as in a movie about somebody of her name.
The Movie Technique
I told her to put the movie screen on the house across the street, which she could see through my front door. I said to make the movie screen small enough so that her emotional state was calm again. I assured her she could clear the issue without having to re-experience the pain.
Then I suggested that she could be in charge of her own emotional state. If she noticed the painful emotions arising again, just move the screen farther away, all the way to Nogales, Mexico if she needed to. Or even farther south, to Costa Rica.
We were doing continuous tapping while talking, on the face, head and torso points, moving to the finger points when our arms got tired.
What was so interesting and wonderful was the next thing that happened.
I could still see distress on her face, so I wanted to make sure she was more protected from the trauma. I used what I call The Container Method, I’ve found to be very effective at clearing issues that are either highly charged or resistant.
The Big Red Heart
I asked her to put the movie in a container. Then I asked her what the container looked like. At first she said, “I can’t see the container, I just know it’s in one.”
Then she said, “No, it’s in a heart. It’s in a red heart.”
I asked her to tell me about the heart, what it was made of, its size. She said, “It’s glass. And it’s breakable. It’s changing. It’s constantly changing. It’s breakable. It’s hard. It’s vulnerable.”
I asked her how big it was. She said, “As big as this room.” And she said the movie inside the heart was called Adios (Good Bye).
While leading her in continual tapping, I thought to myself, “A heart of glass. A breakable heart. A hard heart. A vulnerable heart.”
We simply continued to tap on the image of that red, glass heart. Our tapping went like this:
Eyebrow: It’s a movie about Connie.
Side of Eye: The movie is called Adios.
Under Eye: The movie is in a red heart made of glass.
Under Nose: The heart is as big as this room.
Chin: It’s a breakable heart.
Collarbone: It’s a hard heart.
Under Arm: It’s a vulnerable heart.
Top of Head: It’s a big red heart and it keeps on changing.
We tapped a couple of rounds of that.
I then had Connie take a deep breath, as we switched to the finger points, to give our arms a rest.
I asked her to look at the heart again and see if anything had changed.
“It’s changing! It’s growing!” “It’s as big as this house! It’s as big as a mountain.”
“And it’s not made of glass anymore. It’s flexible. It’s resilient.”
“And it can’t be broken! The love is growing. It’s getting bigger and bigger.”
So we tapped again on that flexible heart that can’t be broken.
Eyebrow: The changing heart.
Side of Eye: It’s as big as a house, as big as a mountain.
Under Eye: The big red heart is no longer made of glass.
Under Nose: It’s flexible now.
Chin: This heart is resilient.
Collarbone: This heart cannot be broken.
Under Arm: This heart is getting bigger and bigger.
Top of Head: The love is growing.
Connie had tears during that round, but she said they tears of relief, tears of love, tears of joy.
Don’t you love the metaphor of how the heart changed from being hard, made of glass and vulnerable – to flexible, resilient and unbreakable? I feel so blessed to be using a technique that helps people tap into their inner wisdom to heal unresolved pain.
She said she felt more love for her son now than she even had when he was alive. Because she had released the guilt she had been carrying. She told me she was in the process of releasing all the things that obscured her from being able to love him fully, she said she felt more love for herself and more love for her mother.
Standing at the door to leave, Connie said she felt lighter than she had in years.
She said it was like she had released a heavy burden she’d been carrying, that she didn’t even know it had been weighing her down.
When we said goodbye, it was with a sense of mutual gratitude and love.
p.s. This type of symbolic work is very powerful for dealing with either traumatic memories or with intangible fears with no associated memories. Click here to see how we might work together, using the EFT tapping technique I call The Container Method.
heart photo from aussiegall