25 Limiting Beliefs and How You Got Them

what causes fear copy 25 Limiting Beliefs and How You Got Them resistance beliefs Resistance and Limiting Beliefs - What’s Blocking You?

When you want something in your life – a new job, to lose weight, to get healthier, a better relationship, to be less anxious or less angry – and it’s not happening…

…you’ve got resistance.

Resistance is the act of blocking or stopping something from moving. The dictionary on my Mac defines resistance as…

“the refusal to accept or comply with something; the attempt to prevent something by action or argument.”

Whenever you want to transform something in your life, attract something new, it helps a lot to identify the resistance that’s keeping you where you are.

Sometimes resistance is obvious.

Here’s an example from my life.

I wanted to lose weight.  That was clear.  But every night I had a craving for comfort food – starchy, fatty carbs like popcorn, pancakes, potato or corn chips.

Even though part of me wanted to lose weight, I wanted the nightly comfort food more.

I didn’t know what was under my craving for nightly comfort food, but I knew I had resistance about letting it go.

Other times you may be unaware you even have resistance.

You may claim that you want to double your income. You feel absolutely clear that you want to be earning twice as much money.  You can’t imagine any reason you’d be feeling any resistance toward it.

But, if you find at the end of the year that your income is the same as last year, you can be sure that you have resistance toward increasing your income.

I recently sold my house and sold or gave away nearly all my stuff. Some of my resistance was obvious to me – like the painful emotions I felt when the low offer for my house came in.

But there were other layers of hidden resistance that took me by surprise. I didn’t know I had so much attachment to all my stuff!

My transition could have been smoother if I’d known upfront what types of inner resistance to look out for and to clear.

Generally, resistance comes in the form of long-held limiting beliefs.

If you’re already convinced about the need to change limiting beliefs, you might want to jump right to my article on Changing Beliefs with EFT.

Most of these beliefs were formed in your early childhood, when you were in a brainwashable state.

Between birth and the age of around 6, children’s brainwaves are in Alpha or Theta. In these states they accept the statements of those they see as authorities as The Truth.

The beliefs we form in childhood become the truths we live by.

These beliefs shape our reality.

We make interpretations of events and form our own life truths.  For example, if a toddler drops something and her mother grimaces, the toddler may interpret the look on Mom’s face and conclude, “There’s something wrong with me.”

Or even, “I’m a bad person,” “I’m unreliable,” or “I can’t be trusted.”

These beliefs are more often limiting than they are empowering.

Beliefs can be fully conscious, but are often under the radar of our awareness, nearly unconscious.

Why would we be unconscious to our beliefs?

Because we are so close to them, beliefs are like wallpaper we see every day and soon don’t notice any more.  This is why Gary Craig referred to our beliefs as “the writing on our walls.”

Here are some of the more common types of resistance in the form of limiting beliefs that can crop up and sabotage your desire for change and growth.

  1. It’s not safe; I need to stay safe
  2. I’m now worthy, good enough, lovable enough,
  3. I don’t deserve good things
  4. Something terrible will happen
  5. It’s greedy to want more
  6. More for me means less for others
  7. Others will resent me, be jealous
  8. Others won’t approve of me, will criticize me, judge me.
  9. I need other’s approval
  10. It’s not safe to shine, to stand out
  11. I need to struggle; life has to be a struggle
  12. I am a victim
  13. I am a martyr
  14. I am a savior
  15. I need to take care of everyone else before me
  16. I can do it better than anyone
  17. I need to work hard
  18. I can’t change
  19. I’m too old; I’m too young
  20. I missed my chance, it’s too late for me
  21. The economy is bad; it’s not the right time
  22. I don’t have the necessary resources – money, time, intelligence, training, credentials, creativity, help, friends, family, etc.
  23. I’m too screwed up by my past and I can’t get over it
  24. I can’t do hard things
  25. Failure is shameful

Being aware of common limiting beliefs is a powerful first step.  When you are aware of them, it’s as if you have the first tool you need to unlock your resistance.

You may not yet have the key, but at least you have now identified the locked door.

Take Action!

As you know, insight without action won’t do much to help you change.

So in the comments below, start taking action by telling me two things:

  1. Which limiting beliefs do you notice slamming a door shut in your life?
  2. Is there a limiting belief that you know how and when it was formed for you?

xo,

Natalie

p.s.  Want to learn these methods so solidly you can change beliefs easily and quickly every day, so you continually move toward that healthier, happier, more prosperous you?

Check out the Change Your Beliefs, Change Your Life class.

 

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About the Author

Natalie Hill is a Transformational Coach for women entrepreneurs. She loves empowering women to bust through their blocks so they can be who they were born to be. Contact Natalie at Google+

{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }

Anonomous February 17, 2012 at 12:11 am

2. I’m now worthy, good enough, lovable enough,

Reply

Lucinda June 13, 2011 at 11:19 pm

Hi Natalie,
I think my brain went on a long vacation or something. no matter what I try no memorys. This is soooo frusterating. HELP!

Reply

Natalie June 14, 2011 at 10:07 pm

Lucinda, Are you using EFT to help with your memory difficulties? If so, I’d suggesting tapping on the problem and asking your intuition to give you insight about the solution. So all that while tapping.

Reply

Myriam June 10, 2011 at 11:11 pm

I used to have quite some limiting beliefs: I can’t afford it, I’m not worth it, money won’t stick to my fingers, no one appreciates me or the skills I have to offer. Some years ago I followed a personal growth program that helped me resolve many of my personal issues directly related to those beliefs instilled by my parents when I was young.
I’m now working on my limiting beliefs about money and learning to live in abundance instead of in scarcity. I’m totally focused on transformation and I’m already noticing changes in my life.
Thank you Nathalie for reminding us about limiting beliefs, I sometimes forgot they stood in the way of acomplishing great things in life.

Reply

Natalie June 13, 2011 at 6:57 pm

Myriam, bravo to you for eliminating your limiting beliefs and for continuing to burn through them.

Reply

Natasha June 9, 2011 at 7:11 pm

I dont know from the belief came but no matter how much i try to change it”i,m not good enough”stays with me. At crucial moments when i need to feel confident feelings of im not good enough..or “they are better”pop into my mind! its so crippling

Reply

Natalie June 13, 2011 at 6:58 pm

Natasha, check out my next article in this series. The method I share may help you let go of that “I’m not good enough” belief.

Reply

caryll June 8, 2011 at 9:05 pm

My mother used to say that she tried to “entertain” her guests. I’m not entertaining, I’m boring. My friends are “Hi, goodby” kind, glad to greet me but never drop in. I can’t ask them because I can’t – you guessed it. I’m tapping on it.

Reply

Natalie June 9, 2011 at 5:03 pm

Good noticing, Caryll. We or others formed our beliefs, we can unform them.

Reply

yemitzky June 8, 2011 at 8:17 pm

Now that I gotten the seemingly fact that drawing me back.am more determined to consciously and unconsciously work on my belief.am sure I will succeed and put this behind me in JESUS NAME!!

Reply

deborah June 8, 2011 at 7:55 am

No matter what I do, or what spiritual books I read for help, I seem to think I am only worthy of “just so much” prosperity. I can’t figure out how to move past this and feel I deserve abundance. I have a wonderful husband, children, grandchildren, friends, I am creative, etc. BUT—there is some type of” ceiling” or “limit” on the wealth I receive. I try to imagine being free of limits, and being open to more of everything, but there is a block. I think it comes from my childhood with a mother who is limited and afraid of everything…and was verbally and physically violent.

Reply

Jean June 8, 2011 at 4:44 am

I can’t do it
it’s too hard
no one will help me
others can do it but not me
I don’t deserve it, I must not, because I don’t have it already
If I deserved it, I would have it

Reply

Monica June 8, 2011 at 3:15 am

1. I can not get over this relationship, even though it isn’t healthy for me or right for me, and brings me much unhappiness.

2. I know I have limiting beliefs, but don’t know exactly what all they are. Actually, I have many.

Reply

Natalie June 9, 2011 at 5:11 pm

Monica, one way to help discover your limiting beliefs is to look at your circumstances and try out statements that might be beliefs underlying them. I’ll give an example, based on your #1 statement.

Here are some possible beliefs.
I’m not worthy of love.
I can’t make it on my own.
Happiness is not possible for me.
I’m not lovable.
I need to suffer.

You just make them up, say or think them, and see if they feel true to you – if you resonate with them. We often don’t want to look at these beliefs, because they’re not pleasant.

But known or unknown, seen or unseen, they are running our lives. So it’s much better to see them, because then we have a chance of doing something about them.

Reply

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