Here’s a tapping script parents can use on the concern for their child who doesn’t study. For the backstory on this, see the article, Can EFT help my son study?
Who This is For
This tapping script is for a parent with the concern that a child in high school or college is not studying.
But before you deal with the thoughts and emotions around not studying, it’s necessary to make sure the child has the ability to study.
Children need to be taught how to study, how to get organized, how to prioritize and manage their time. Teachers often assume those skills are there, and give homework assignments without teaching the basic skills that will enable success.
If study skills are lacking, then teaching your child study skills, hiring a tutor or signing him/her up for a study skills class may be a better solution than EFT tapping.
Tapping Script – My Son Won’t Study
Tap continuously on the karate chop point while saying:
Even though my child doesn’t study, I love and accept myself anyway.
Even though I’m worried about how this will affect his future, I accept myself and all my feelings.
Even though I’m afraid I must have done something wrong as a parent, I want to love and accept myself anyway.
Tapping – Dumping Round
(See the Growing Up Method for more info about the Dumping, Dreaming and Deciding Rounds)
Eyebrow: My child won’t study.
Side of Eye: He never studies.
Under Eye: I can’t make him study.
Under Nose: I’m worried about his grades.
Chin: What if he flunks out of school?
Collarbone: What will people think of him? What will they think of me?
Under Arm: I’m worried about his future.
Top of Head: I feel like I’ve failed as a parent.
Now, that was a Dumping round of expressing and venting your worst fears. But there will likely be many more.
Continue dumping until you feel ready to move on. Express all your worst nightmares and give voice to all those scary fears before moving on to Dreaming.
With Dreaming, we begin our statements with “What if,” and “Wouldn’t it be nice,” to help ease the new ideas and beliefs through the mind’s gatekeepers. This helps prevent those inner rebuttals that prevent us from moving to a more positive and resourceful place.
Set Up for Dreaming
Even though I still have lots of fears about my son, I wonder how I could be most helpful to him now.
Even though I really wish my son would study, what if I could resolve my own fears and take that pressure off my son.
Even though I know it would be so much better for his future if he made good grades in school, what if I could have the insight to know the best way to help my son take responsibility for his education.
Tapping – Dreaming Round
Eyebrow: What if I could be truly helpful to my son now?
Side of Eye: What if I could be open to understanding his needs right now?
Under Eye: What if I could resolve my own remaining issues about school and education?
Under Nose: What if I could know that I’ve done my best as a parent, even though my parenting was imperfect?
Chin: Wouldn’t it be great if I could have insight about how to best clear my own issues around this?
Collarbone: Wouldn’t it be great if I could have insight about how to best help my son right now?
Under Arm: What if I could forgive myself for everything I did and didn’t do, knowing I was always doing the best I could with who I was at the time?
Top of Head: Wouldn’t it be good if I could give my son the love and support he needs, which will help him make his own best choices?
Again, continue tapping on your own What if’s until you feel ready for the Deciding round.
In the Deciding Round, we make statements beginning with “I’ve Decided,” and “I Choose.”
Deciding Set Up
Even though I still have my doubts about just trusting and loving him unconditionally, I’ve decided that I feel much better feeling loving and supportive.
Even though I still do wish he would study, I’ve decided to trust in that essence of goodness, creativity and resourcefulness within him.
Even though I’m still a little worried that I made serious mistakes as a parent, I choose to know that I’ve always done my best.
Tapping – Deciding Round
Eyebrow: I choose to remember that I wasn’t always the best student and I’m ok.
Side of Eye: I choose to trust in my son’s natural intelligence and know that whether he studies or not, his intelligence is still there.
Under Eye: I choose to know that I cannot force my son to study and I choose to allow him to make his own choices on this, as he will have to as adult.
Under Nose: I choose to trust that in every moment, I’m doing my best as a parent.
Chin: I choose to know that my son’s life is his own to live – separate from me.
Collarbone: I choose to trust in that core goodness within my son, and within me.
Under Arm: I choose to work on my own issues around this so I can be the most present, grounded and loving I can be.
Top of Head: I choose to feel love and trust and confidence in my son and his own life course.
This tapping script was a challenge for me to write. I spent a lot of time tweaking and revising it. I’d love your feedback.
How did this work for you?